Sunday, November 4

Watching my flowers grow

I wrote a whole long Blog, mostly dedicated to the return of my snoring husband and my lack of sleep. I re-read it and it sounded very anti-husband, so I am rewriting this Blog.

I love my husband dearly but I cannot sleep in the same room/bed/hemisphere with him. I have a, some may call strange, little ritual that I follow before actually switching off the lights at night. I need absolute quiet and total darkness, essential components to a good nights sleep. Firstly - I have a special pillow, second - silicone earplugs, third - green, now rag, of a t-shirt covering my eyes, and lastly NO stand-by lights. You know, the little light on the tv/dvd/vcr that is on in stand-by mode. I have to pull out the tv and dvd plugs from the wall so there is no irritating light on, it will disturb my sleep. I know I am odd, but we all have our issues. Enter newly-reunited-with-his-family snoring husband. I have slept like a baby for the last month, and now, I am back to nodding-off-mid-sentence mode. We tried the first two nights. It didn't go very well. You get Apologetic Snorers (like my Mom) and then you get Aggressive Snorers, my beloved husband is the latter. Huffing puffing moaning indignation at any reference to his snoring, I usually starts with delicate little pats, followed by "Doll, you're snoring, please roll over", this sweet little version of me soon changes to She-Devil Lianne, pushing, shoving, shouting, pleading, kicking, boxing. Nothing works, with every breath it is just a constant attack at me. How come snorers don't know that they snore??? It is an absolute anomaly to me how he can be talking to me in one breath and making these ghastly guttural noises with the next. Every noise shuddering through my body. In the early hours of the morning, after hours and hours of this constant barrage, I can truly understand people committing some or other heinous crime. Just to make it stop! Sad to say I encourage Uri to 'watch tv' in the lounge, as it is a 'given' that he will fall asleep there, and I can happily sleep away, separately. Such Bliss! I get so easily used to my own independance and self reliance, it always takes me a day or two to get back into couple-dom.

Uri arrived home on Friday morning, Friday afternoon there was a stunning Moshav Fun Day that the teenagers of the Moshav put together, horse-rides, ice-cream, drum circle, bonfire, guitar players, stilt walkers, clay corner, painting, and loads more. It was really lovely, I had a nice mushy feeling of belonging here. Adam and Noam were in their element as all their friends were there, neither wanted to leave. In the sand they had created a mini-map of the Moshav, and each child made with clay their own house and then added it to the 'map'. I like this place.

Friday night we were at Uri's parents. Nothing earth-shattering there. This coming Friday, Yay, we are having Friday night here, it will be my first proper Erev-Shabbat in our new home, so looking forward to it. Uri's parents are celebrating their millionth wedding anniversary, they were married when my mother-in-law was around 16. I think they are going away for a naughty weekend to the Dead Sea, good for them for being naughty! So the usual crowd of Uri's siblings are invited, I hope it will be nice.

This past Saturday I had the dreaded conversation with Uri regarding trying to 'do a bit more' to 'feel a bit more Jewish', long story, but I don't think I have him on board. Not quite sure how I am going to proceed. Will keep you posted.

Regarding cat, Sunday has come and gone, and it is still alive. He (I think) is really sweet, very loving, and just wants attention all the time. He has not dared to venture out the house yet, he just cruises inside, happy in the knowledge that he is fed and taken care of. Also I think he may be allergic to himself, is that possible? He sneezes and sniffs all the time. Noam's choice of name 'Yo-yo' changed this morning to 'Jo-jo', that and Adams' suggestion of 'Tom' are neither a hit with me. I sent them off to school this morning with the task of thinking up both a female and male name for the cat. Later today, depending on my blood test results, I will take the cat to the vet and establish the cat's gender, and sort out the sniffs and snots.

About the blood-tests, once again wonderful experience, me Emla'd up, poor nurse faced with about 20 Israelis all vying to gain entry into her little sanctuary. From the crowd she picks out one or two faces, mine being one of them and sais, "Boi tikansi ut", translated verbatim, "Come in you" (such finesse). Ofcourse I proudly, head held high, smug look (of note) on my face, push my way through the little crowd. As an IVF patient I have 'status'! I have thought long and hard about my possible pregnant predicament, I am 99.9% NOT pregnant, but if I was ovulating on day 19 or day 20, maybe there is a 0.1% chance. With a husband who is away from home a lot, you get 'good-bye sex', and 'hello sex'. Remember the trip to China, and the home for a day and a half, and the the trip to SA? Need I say more? This was the 'hello' and the 'goodbye'. So I guess there is a chance, miraculously. I should get the results later today then, if it is negative, all Progesterone and Estrogen levels will also be where they should be, ie really low. And I will be able to start the Follicle Stimulating Hormones and make lots and lots of little follicles.

Blood taken, I rushed off, got the children, dropped them off at school, and then went for a lovely walk with my one arty-friend. I have to buckle up the children nowadays, apparently last week the police were cruising the Moshav and stopping mothers who were not wearing seat belts and checking that children were belted up and in safety seats. They take it all very seriously. A while back after we moved in, Uri and I went with Uris' uncle, Menashe, to Ikea to get some more furniture. On the way back on the highway I was sitting at the back of the car, a traffic policeman drove past and noticed that I had no belt on and pulled us over. Very Israeli-aggressive, he demanded to know why I wasn't wearing my belt, and why Menashe (the driver) had not been a responsible driver and made sure that me as his passenger had my seat belt on. The whole event lasted close on a half an hour, the policeman radioing in the registration number, checking all our identity documents, etc. Also there was a problem with Menashe. I think someone must have told him when he was much younger that he had a lovely smile, and he probably used it to get himself out of sticky situations. Well this was his Modus Operandi on said day. He just smiled and smiled, trying to get us out of what we had gotten into. It did not help. The point-system is used here, and if you get a ticket you also get points against your drivers licence, if you get enough points your drivers licence is taken away from you. Not a pleasant prospect. So with all of Menashes' grinning, the policeman concluded that he must be drunk, and made him take a breathalyser test. So you don't want to mess with the Traffic Police here, no such thing as bribing anybody with a can of coke, no way!

It's so easy making friends when you are young, at my ripe old age it is not. You can't just walk up to someone you like the look of and say "Hi, can I be your friend?" You would look like a screaming-sociopath. And especially here, the spikes would come out. Israel is full of "Sabra's", meaning prickly-pear, a simile used to describe Israelis, hard and prickly on the outside; soft and sweet on the inside. I am lucky as I really enjoy my own company, I can be a social-butterfly, but I am as happy in my own skin and with my own self. I am finding that the best way to meet people and carve my way is through my children. I meet the parents of their friends, sometime there is chemistry and sometimes not, same as anywhere in the world, and in life. So there is chemistry with this one new friend I have made, I really like her, she is young and fun, and we have a lot in common, her husband also travels a lot, she likes to walk and she likes to paint. She is gentle, spiritual, open about her feelings and she talks. We speak Hebrew which I find a bit restrictive, but she doesn't seem to mind my blundering. There is a sadness to her as well, her mother died when she was 15, and I think quite understandably that is a real issue. She lives in a beautiful Templer home.

This Moshav has a wonderful history which you see everywhere. Around 1899 these German christians, called Templers (not the ones from the Da Vinci Code) came to Israel to build a Christian Colony here, like my mother they had a deep spiritual love for Israel. One of the places they started up was here. It was originally called Wilhemla, after Kaizer Wilhelm, they thrived agriculturally and supplied goods for the Israeli market, unfortunately with the outbreak of the Second World War they were expelled due to their allegiance to Hitler. They left, but their beautiful homes remained. Full of stories and history, some are now crumbling and some have been restored. It was these houses that made me fall in love with this Moshav.

Google "Israel Templer Wilhelma" and go to the wikikpedia entry, it is the first result displayed, or try to find out more information, also take not of the picture of the "Templers in Wilhelma Community" picture, the building in the background is Adam and Noams school now.

So back to my life, I am going to go and watch my flowers grow, and try not to think about the blood test results.


"Q: In which cases does removal of the fallopian tubes improve the outcome?
A: In recent years, impressive evidence has shown that hydrosalpinx (swollen fallopian tubes, filled with fluid) can reduce chances of implantation. It seems that the reason for this is that the fluid in the fallopian tubes contains inflammatory products that leak into the abdominal cavity and damage the embryo trying to implant itself in the endometrium. In cases of recurrent failure of IVF therapy, the condition of the fallopian tubes should always be assessed using a hysterosalpingogram and ultrasound scan. If the state of the fallopian tubes is very poorly, and might affect the implantation of the embryos, the benefit of their removal should be considered. The removal of oneor both fallopian tubes is performed by laparoscopy, where a laparoscope (a fine telescope) is inserted through an umbilical incision."